What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex
Ratings34
Average rating4
Enlightening and enjoyable.
Fantastic work on Asexuality and the Ace community. Enjoyed the new views that this book shared and its commentary on sexuality, compulsory sexuality, and the world.
“Liberated sexuality–that is, sexuality free from social shaming–can look like promiscuity or it can look like celibacy.” (p. 59)
“It seems that the message is ‘we have liberated our sexuality, therefore we must now celebrate it and have as much sex as we want,'” says Jo, an ace policy worker in Australia. “Except ‘as much sex as we want' is always lots of sex and not no sex, because then we are oppressed, or possibly repressed, and we're either not being our true authentic selves, or we haven't discovered this crucial side of ourselves that is our sexuality in relation to other people, or we haven't grown up properly or awakened yet.” (p. 54)
“Sexual attraction, then, is horniness toward or caused by a specific person [or gender]. It is the desire to be sexual with that partner–libido with a target. To use a food metaphor: a person can feel physiological hunger, which would be like the sex drive, without craving a specific dish, which would be more like sexual attraction. And just as people have different sex drives, they also experience different levels of sexual attraction.” (p. 21)
“If aces make a big deal out of being ace and demand to be recognized, if we have created groups of our own, it is because we want a place away from sexual pressure. If we fight for visibility and change, it is because we want that pressure to be lifted for others too.” (p. 45)