Fifty Shades Darker

I made it to the third chapter and decided to not torture myself with this any further. I can only imagine that people get through this series by skimming through to possibly only read the sex scenes. Which are admittedly not completely horrible. But everything in between is irrefutably painful to read. I found myself literally rolling my eyes, sighing, scoffing, groaning, cringing, and downright facepalming.

If Ana were a real person and I could talk to her I'd tell her to run her naive butt away from the abusive and domineering (not in the good way) relationship she was being trapped in. Because, guess what? THIS IS ABUSE. This isn't sexy. This is scary. Not the BDSM stuff, but everything else. Adults are fully capable of having a healthy relationship with some incredibly kinky sex. They're even fully capable of having a 24/7 Dom/sub relationship. This just happens to be none of that.

I could argue that Christian is possibly trying to get Ana into a 24/7 BDSM relationship. Except any decent Dom who's connected to a sub knows when to push, and when not to. Christian pretty much pushes all the time. He does what he wants, and he manages to wrap it in a barely pretty enough package to fool Ana. Hello mind games!

So, Ana, I don't care if the sex is mind blowing. The guy's a creep. He's scary. He treats his subordinates like chattel or with the bare minimum of respect. Oh, and you are so not on this planet to fix him. Run, don't walk, as far and as fast as you can. Pray that law enforcement will help you keep this guy at bay, because he'll for sure pull every string to keep owning you. That broken heart you think you have? It'll mend. And when it does you'll realize it was probably just your lady part hormones making you stupid lustful for the earth-shattering O's. Trust me; been there, done that.