I'm Glad My Mom Died

I didn't have Nickelodeon in my childhood, nor do I have any idea about American television shows and stars from the 80s and 90s. So this book wasn't even on my radar until I saw the various discussions on social media about the title, and also some of the abuse allegations against a children's show creator from the times and by the time I realized the connection between the two, I had gotten this audiobook copy. So I decided why not give it a try.

And wow is this a powerful one. Right from the shocking prologue, it's a raw and honest portrayal of a childhood full of manipulation and abuse by the author's mother and I have to say it wasn't easy to listen to most of the time. But the author (who is also narrating the audiobook) injects humor into a somewhat bleak story of her life, telling us about how she was essentially forced into acting, then given an eating disorder by her mother, constantly emotionally manipulated and micromanaged which only led to many more years of her dealing with anorexia, bulimia, alcohol addiction and more. It's heartbreaking and very rage inducing, especially when you see the author trying to justify her mother's actions as love. It's only much later after her mother's passing and going to therapy does she realize that what she went through was abuse.

What I found interesting was that the author's tone is never judgmental of her mother. She only relates the incidents as they happened and lets us form our own opinions. And the way she almost skims over the whole part about how she came to the realization of the abuse and came to terms with it and her relationship with her mom in that context, shows that she probably doesn't want to accuse her mom in her own words. I can only hope that she is doing much better in her life now and is able to move forward in her life.