Plain Bad Heroines

Remember when I said I was annoyed by the indulgence of Honey Girl? That its irreverence impeded it more than colored it? This, this book is how you do indulgence. Where else are you going to get a story where three women fall unapologetically and non-committedly in love with each other?

Ok, sometimes the irreverence was a bit much, but most of the time it was just right.

Plain Bad Heroines is many stories in one. If that's freaking you out a bit, I wouldn't worry. It's less confusing and unwieldly than it sounds. There is the story of Flo and Clara - the inciting incident, that in fact only takes a small portion of the book -, two girls enamored with the memoir of Mary Maclane and each other (I read this book under the assumption that Ms. MacLane was something Danforth had made up, but she and her books are very real, as it turns out), the story of the chaos that erupts at their school after their horrifying deaths, and then the story of two actresses and a young writer a hundred years later, all trying to put the story to screen without falling to the supposed curse themselves. The stories of Audrey, Harper and Merritt in the present day has the clever irreverence of contemporary fiction along with a suspenseful Hollywood feel, while the one happening in the past is a frightening gothic horror story. All the while yellow jackets hum in the background, shining black apples rot in a field, and Emily Danforth is intent on haunting your mind with every element of this story.

This book is great. Despite its girth, its a profoundly easy read. It's 600+ pages and I read it in 20 days. I haven't done that in...I don't even know. Ninth House took me four months. As stated, this book is indulgent with the way it digs into the characters stories and relationships, but its also economical and efficient with the way their drawn. Harper Harper, the bona fide movie star, is marked by her affableness and charm, her ability to be indefatigably sexy and pleasant at the same time. Merritt Emmons, the author of the book that tells the story of Flo and Clara and their school, is understandably the opposite - prickly as a cactus, but deeply relatable. Audrey Wells is the closest to the “everywoman,” the mostly unremarkable actor daughter of a notorious scream queen, who is the most effected by the otherworldliness of shooting a scary movie at the cursed Brookhants school. Danforth gives each of them their stories and their perspectives, but also doesn't try too hard to make you believe them. Which I appreciate. Danforth trusts her story and her reader.

This strategy is maybe a little less effective with the characters in the past story - Libbie Brookhants and her lover Alexandra Trills. It's not until you hear Libbie's backstory that you understand that this principal of a boarding school for girls was in fact a wild child caught in a web that she never could have anticipated (well, maybe a little), and poor poor Alex deserved better (I hate that phrase, by the way, especially when it comes to horror. It's horror! Everyone deserved better! But still, poor Alex). When we had to return to the past, especially when it was Alex's POV, I found myself a little irritated. But Danforth is very clever with the way she bounces backing forth between past and present, from character to character. It's done in a very crafty way to keep you engaged, and just about every chapter is worth it, even if there are certain characters that you would prefer to be reading instead. While the present story is funny and charming with some thrills thrown in to remind you this is in fact horror, the one in the past is rich with mystery and intrigue. For those aesthetically minded, its a brilliant mashup of dark academia and pulp slasher vibes.

That all being said, Plain Bad Heroines is a lot of a lot of things. As such it lacks the streamlined precision that is often necessary for the genres and elements its throwing together. Instead of choosing a particular ghost or reasoning, Danforth instead uses these pieces (black seaweed, buzzing yellow jackets, nesting dolls, poisonous flowers etc etc) and repeats them over and over to get you drunk on atmosphere. The characters are not so much terrorized but so overwhelmed they become delirious. Its incredible fun and deeply absorbing, but when all is said and done its a little...meaningless? There's no evil witch to defeat, no malady to overcome, no tortured ghost to free. No lesson. Should all scary stories have lessons? Most of them do, at least the ones we like to tell. This one though is more like real life ghost stories. The characters live through it and then live on with it. It's not clean and tidy, but it is very satisfying and very enjoyable.

Also gay. Just absolutely undeniably sapphic and gay. Like I said, this is the kind indulgence I like.