The Midnight Library

I will start off by saying I had really high expectations of this book based on the reviews and it being a Goodreads 2020 winner. It's engaging and easy to read, and I'm sure it could help some people get through rough times.

That being said, I found The Midnight Library to be a bit shallow and entirely predictable - like I was reading a mediocre YA book. I feel that the way depression is addressed in this book is immature and solved with empty platitudes. It's A Christmas Story with a modern woman twist, guided by a frustratingly apathetic librarian instead of ghosts.

Nora is down and out. Everything is going wrong, or at least she feels it is. Her spiral is the most gripping part of this book. When she eventually feels so in despair that she commits suicide, it kind of feels.. Like it comes from the plot needing to be driven rather than the character herself.

Once we get to the Midnight Library we start to go on our wild ride of different lives, something that you'd think should be super fun. Instead, every new life offers a view of the worst possible scenarios that Nora would be in if she did something she regretted not doing or vice versa. The author basically takes away any accountability in Nora's character by weaving a series of scenarios where her life is worse if she made different decisions:

Stayed with your ex-fiancé you walked out of your wedding on? He would have cheated on you and had a drinking problem anyway.

Didn't quit a promising swimming career? You would still be depressed, your dad would be a cheating scumbag and your mom would die alone.

Didn't back out last minute on an Australia trip with your best friend? She would die in a car crash on your birthday if you went.

Went out to coffee with that cute guy you turned down? Life is pretty good but your piano student's life goes down the wrong path and now he's a juvenile delinquent.

It feels like the book was made to show that no matter how good or bad your decision is, the life she lived is somehow the best of them all. It feels like there's a lack of self-reflection. Maybe Nora is kind of a shitty person for the things she's done to the people closest to her? No, that can't be. She shouldn't regret any decision she's made. Maybe she could take an ounce of accountability for where she is in her life? Well sure, but the only accountability you need to take is +staying positive+ when life temporarily sucks. There are a lot of people in situations where letting go of things and keeping your chin up isn't the cure to depression. This feels like the self-help 101 bandaid approach to the idea of mental illness.

Nora is also a self-proclaimed philosophy nerd, but I have never read a character lacking this amount of self-awareness or understanding of “the point”. She spends well over a year, maybe multiple years going through different lives and still doesn't spend a moment to think about all those philosophical perspectives of the mind and reality that the author tries to say she loves. After all her experiences she's still floundering in this alternate reality asking her guide what she's supposed to do. How can she quote philosophies and not take a minute to delve into literally any of the self-improving philosophies or ideas? It makes it feel like you're watching a teenager with limited understanding of philosophical concepts go through the motions rather than a highly educated 30-something year old.

The ending wraps up in a beautiful little bow that's sickeningly sweet. All of Nora's biggest regrets, all the things that were leaving her in despair are suddenly fixed. Her brother and her were on bad terms? Turns out a cry for help fixes everything. Best friend and you are drifting apart? Turns out she was just busy and she's moving back to your country next month! Your only piano student quit? No, he wants to continue lessons now! For all the unfixed things, well, didn't we learn they aren't her problem? Got fired from her job? Don't worry, it was a failing business anyway! Cat died? He would have died anyway! Ex-fiancé is still heartbroken? He was a fucking jerk, who cares!

It turns out that Nora was just suffering from situational depression, regardless of her history with anti-depressants. After the Midnight Library she has a new outlook on life. That's great for her, but the reader could have seen that coming within the first 80 pages. Once the first alternate life was so unsubtly wrong it was obvious that this was a self-help, don't-wallow-in-your-regrets type story. Sometimes it's okay to know the ending because the journey is enjoyable, but in this book it just felt like every different life somehow had the fun sucked out of it in order to spell out a moral or empty platitude. You knew she would inevitably be disappointed (whether it be by something so big as the death of a loved one or so small as boring sex) and she would learn that no life is perfect so just enjoy the one you have.

Overall, super preachy, lacking any subtlety, with a lead character whose main personality trait is that she doesn't have much of her own personality or identity at all.