Throne of Glass

So, full disclosure: Once Upon a Time, I read the original Throne of Glass on Fictionpress. All the cool (and even the not cool kids!) were doing it! I'd wait for updates and eagerly phone a friend who also read, and we would eagerly discuss the newest developments and debate the pros and cons of love interests. She was Team proto-Dorian, and I was Team proto-Chaol but figured she'd probably end up with Dorian.

Even if I had not known Queen of Glass, however, I think there is no way that I would have been surprised to learn that this was a fictionpress original. Mostly because it has pretty much all the greatest hits of Fictionpress Fantasy Cliche. Throne of Glass ft. Corset Hate* (I'd Much Rather Wear Pants), Evil Tyrant Who is Evil, Heroine with Unusual Eyes, I'm Not Like the Rest of These Airheaded Twits (The Casual Misogyny Song), and In Your Dreams (Destiny Is Bossing You Around).

Okay, here's the thing about Calaena. I like her-she's flawed in unusual and interesting ways. I like that she's vain because I'm tired of plain heroines who complain about being plain and beautiful heroines who are convinced they are plain and beautiful heroines who act like it's a curse. You go, girl. Make it work for you. She's fiercely proud. Now, these would be great if the book would just let them stand on their own instead of beating you over the head with them with oh she's stunning, oh she's so talented. Worse, it does this without usually not by showing but explicitly telling. Yawn.

So like I said I like Calaena, but I could have liked her a whole lot more. The major problem is that I find it hard to root for her and hold my breath in suspense because her flaws and faults have so little weight. Sure, they pop up all the time, but it's easily brushed away either by the narrative or by other characters. Go to the ball that you're not supposed–a few cross words and then all is forgiven. There's never a lack of surety to her or the narrative. It never seems like a struggle. Sure, in most narratives it's a fairly safe bet that the protag is going to succeed, but still watching them snatch victory out of the jaws of defeat is exhilarating! There is none of that as Calaena sails through test after test.

Even more annoying during possibly the only tense moment, the day is saved not by our heroine or cleverness from one of our heroes but rather by a rather deus ex machina apperance.

There's also a strange discrepancy between her history and some of personality traits. Like, okay, she's been trained to be an assassin since she was eight, but despite this, she's pretty street dumb. Yeah, you eat that candy that randomly showed up in your bed despite the fact that you know an ancient evil is lurking somewhere in the palace and killing your competitors. Despite there being an explicit discussion of there being no honor among assassins, trust pretty much every random person who offers you assistance.

There's also some minor continuity issues. For example, Calaena complains that Chaol never laughs and jokes with her like Dorian does even though there are literally a dozen scenes of them doing just that.

There's some sloppy editing. Maas has a weird penchant for adding comma, and there is an appalling amount of sentences that start with And.

Mostly, the thing I find most distressing is that Throne of Glass is distressing shallow compared to the Fictionpress Queen of Glass. Really! I don't know if Throne of Glass was dumbed down for the YA market, but it really lost a lot of the things that made it great, leaving you with a shallow, fluffy read that isn't even fun to read.

A tepid two and a half stars out of five