jess

i officially despise back to back alternative timelines

& this book just lost me idk, it just wasnt as good as i expected it to be

and a LOT of things were just trop tirés par les cheveux honestly, at some point i had to violently roll my eyes

it was doing too much, too many twists, too many reveals, too many turns, & those hallucinations? ass

very unsatisfactory read, 2.5

basically a conversation on : self hate, self gaslighting, insecurity, jealousy & inferority complex (that turns into a false sense of superiority)

didn't love the characters, but i certainly felt bad for them, and for the way society transformed their very soul

a lot of heavy themes, a lot of psychological issues portrayed, and an interesting dive into the fragility of the human psyche

× yuriko was basically objectified from the way she was born, and thus accepted her deeply unfortunate situation as her essence, the reason of her existence

x her sister was so, so insecure god, qu'elle a dirigé cette haine envers sa soeur. i hated her behavior but its like i get you

× same for kazue, miss gurl turned her inferiority complex to some extreme haughtiness, never seen someone gaslight themselves this hard

its like, sure these characters are deeeeply flawed, all of em, but i really can't bring myself to hate them. si elles avaient vécu dans des conditions familiales & sociales différentes, im sure they wouldn't be the same

and don't even get me started w the men in this book god, rotten disgusting vile THROW EM IN THE NEAREST TRASH CAN RIGHT FUCKING NOW, ALL OF EM


^ btw who killed kazue, or did they go back to the apt & he killed her ???

^ & i hateeeed zhang's monologue, like sir nobody cares your grandpa had 5 goats shut up

THIS BOOK WAS AMAZING

A soul crushing take on fascism & a deep dive into the effects of extreme despair and will to live on humans.

There were time I was literally too anxious to read because I was TOO INVESTED I felt like I was also hiding on the island

The ending quote made me tear up GOD it just tastes like hope and pain at the same time

Gobbled these 600 pages in like 2 days & im a slow reader, that's how good this book is

One of the most thrilling & emotionally engaging dystopian books I ever read

6/5