kath

“so much of my life has felt so out of my control for so long. and i'm done with that being my reality. i want my life to be in my hands. not an eating disorder's or a casting director's or an agent's or my mom's. mine.”

this is one of the heaviest books i have ever read. i had to take several breaks while reading to fully grasp that this is not fiction and did actually happen. it hurt my heart especially because i grew up with nickeloden and jennette mccurdy played a character i loved as a child. reading about how uncomfortable she felt playing this character, changed my perspective completely. i'm so sorry for all the things she had to go through and i hope that she continues to heal. and yes, i'm glad her mom died too.

trigger warnings for this book: eating disorders, child abuse, emotional abuse, alcoholism, addiction, grief, cancer, death of parent, mental illness, panic attacks, grooming, sexual abuse, body shaming

I started reading this because it was the only ebook on Prime Reading that appealed to me – I mean, it's sapphic and it fit pretty well with the holidays, so I thought it might be interesting!

Unfortunately, I've learned that digital reading is not really for me. I just prefer holding a physical book in my hands. I only read 23% of the book, but I found the characters quite interesting. I would have loved to find out how the relationship between the protagonist and the love interest would have developed. If I ever find this book as a physical book in my bookstore during Christmas time, I will definitely try to read it again.