Mariana

if you read Twilight in the best faith, gave it the benefit of the doubt in every way, and analyzed it far too closely, you'd come up with something like Life and Death. it's everything I loved about Twilight, all the pieces that were sort of simmering under the surface

there's just something so heart wrenching about two lonely, miserable people looking at each other and saying 'you, forever'

if you hated Twilight, you're not going to like this either. if you read Twilight and went 'ugh, so much wasted potential', you'll probably love it

(all of S Meyer's weirdness is still present btw, don't be fooled by my glowing review)

I'm not sure where to put this in my ranking of Agatha Christie novels but it's definitely a favorite. The characters are so vivid, and that's always what pulls me in with her writing, but I think this story relies on it in a way the others I've read don't. It reminds me of Wuthering Heights in a way, how the tragedy is all past and inescapable, the bittersweetness of the ending.... after it all, there is still possibility because there is still life, there is still youth....

and, of course, there's nothing I love as much as a misunderstood woman

This was such an unserious book .... I loved Giddon's continued character development and I did find myself liking him and Bitterblue together despite the truly alarming age gap but this was a silly book with a silly plot and very oversimplified political dynamics. It felt the most YA. I'm actually not sure how we went from Graceling and Fire to this, and it generally didn't feel like part of the series in any meaningful way. It was fun and I had a great time reading it but it just doesn't live up to its predecessors.

It's a little slower than Graceling and Fire, but the exploration of history and memory and trauma requires the extra space I think. It feels more YA than the two previous books, despite its subject matter, and I didn't buy into the politics, especially towards the end. The resolution felt both oversimplified and unsatisfying to me. Regardless of the ways it fell flat for me, it did make me cry several times. Most notably when Fire shows Bitterblue how much bigger she is than the hurt she's feeling.

This is one of my all-time favorite books and it gets better with every reread. I can't help but love what and who Fire loves, and she loves so much and so many. I think that's sort of the overall theme of this book, love in all it's forms and all the ways it changes us. Fire grows up lonely and afraid of herself, and despite all the tragedy in this book, I can't help but find hope in the journey she goes on, one that ultimately ends in an expansive family that adores her and the knowledge that she is capable of more love than cruelty. Every part of this book destroyed me, but the relationship between the royal siblings the most. Nash and Brigan especially. When Nash tells Fire that he loves his brother more than he realized before she came along... Yeah, I cried like a baby. Generally, this is a story that is as much about family as it is about monsters.

I have read Graceling before, but it's been seven years and I knew I was going to get more out of it now than I did when I was a teenager. That being said, I wasn't prepared for how viscerally angry it made me. Reading it now, Katsa seems so much more vulnerable. Despite her physical power, she lives in constant fear and anxiety, primarily because other people feel unpredictable and unknowable to her. She has a hard time understanding the motivations and emotions of others and it makes her avoidant of forming relationships. No matter what her character or abilities are, she is perpetually on the outside of every conversation, every joke. She is vulnerable, sure, but she isn't immature. This is a fact that escapes most of the men in this book, which is the reason why I was filled with rage for the first half of the book. Once Katsa leaves the court, I started to feel better, and especially after she realizes that her Grace isn't killing. And, in the end, it's her relationship with Po that enables her to overcome her weaknesses, in every sense of the word. He teaches her to trust herself, and even when she loses control, it's him that pulls her back to herself. The ending is just the final manifestation of this, killing Leck not because he is threatening her or because she has broken free of his power, but because her loyalty and her instinct to protect Po is stronger than her own control.

I read this expecting a fun & silly urban fantasy romance, only for it to emotionally wreck me. It was such a heartbreaking and accurate portrayal of grief and depression and the mortifying reality that in order to be loved, you must be known, in all your screwed up glory.

I don't care what I deserve, I want you.