10 Things That Never Happened

dnf at 62%

this is utterly subjective but i think this book just isn't for me. it falls completely flat, i was willing to overlook the very questionable premise for the sake of a romcom but man. if you have read boyfriend material and liked it, then dont read this book because it feels like a poor imitation of it.

if i had to sum it up, this book is just: ridiculous lies that will blow up in the protag's face one day, meaningless banter between two dimensional characters and “funny” shenanigans that overstay their welcome and dont add anything to the story. it feels so superficial in every single way.

i was at 62% and realized that i dont think these two people should ever be together and i think that's when it hit me: okay maybe i need to stop reading this

Please go find the audiobook of this one and just enjoy it while doing chores and enjoying a cup of coffee!
Yes the story is so fake it's funny, but this is such a feel good, funny story that just made my day. And Will Watt narrated it soooo good, it cracks me up!
It not a masterpiece that will go into classic, I don't think Alexis Hall is trying that, but this is an excellent written book, with an interesting plot and so many smart phrases!
Enjoy

2.5 stars. I loved a lot about 10 Things That Never Happened, but there were equally as many things I disliked.

The humor here won't be everyone's cup of tea, but I loved it. It's sort of crass with lots of swearing, and Alexis Hall's comedy doesn't usually feel cliche to me—and when it does, it doesn't make me cringe.

“...Claire, my assistant manager, sticks her head out of the office door and yells “His Royal Dickishness is on the phone” the entire length of the store. Which she follows with, “And don't worry, I've got him muted.”

“That just means,” I yell back, “that you can't hear him, not that he can't hear you.”

“Well, balls.”

The side characters made the story way more enjoyable. Even though one of them in particular made me want to strangle him cough—Brian—cough they were all an eccentric bunch that made the book very lively and entertaining.

As for the things I disliked about this book...

The romance didn't really work for me, which is a shame because the romance is the entire point of a book marketed as a romcom. Sam, the main POV character, has a likeable enough personality but he makes pretty terrible decisions. But humans are flawed, and I can cut him some slack since ultimately, his intentions were (kind of) commendable in a black-and-white-morality sort of way.

has to

But my goodness, Jonathan was an awful love interest to follow. I feel somewhat apathetic to completely good and morally righteous characters, I've loved plenty of them, but I do prefer a morally grey character that feels like a real human who makes mistakes and learns from them. But Jonathan tested my patience in a different level...

‘His Royal Dickishness' is an apt name for him. He's so insufferable to be around—and no his baggage and daddy issues doesn't excuse it in my opinion—yet despite that, Sam gets feelings for him. Usually in morally ambiguous characters there is something hidden under the layers of the love interest's grumpiness that the MC latches onto, but there was nothing with Jonathan. His redeemable qualities are visible after his redemption arc, which didn't make sense given that Sam clearly fell for him even while Jonathan was being a prick with nothing else to back him up. It made the romance feel unconvincing.

The 3rd act breakup here is inevitable from the beginning, so it didn't feel like it came out of left field which was great! Unfortunately, things get resolved too quickly, and everything just sort of... happens. It was all very meh.

Both Sam and Jonathan make mistakes, mistakes that both of them should seek redemption and forgiveness for. But it felt like Sam was given a lot less slack than Jonathan. Sam's redemption process results in the whole 3rd act breakup. But with Jonathan, his dickishness was so obnoxious and dehumanizing, yet one moment of mere verbal apologies redeemed him... and he's one of those pricks who have a ‘hard time' saying sorry outright but oh... it's just his personality. I have a vendetta against grumpy characters who can't say the words I'm sorry and have to tip toe around it. I think being able to verbalize apologies should be a part of the character development, but that might just be me. The scales weren't balanced enough for my liking.

Overall, the romance didn't feel very romantic... it felt more like things just sort of happened and the characters fell in love because that's what the plot needed, not because there was something earned and worth falling for (in Sam's case—I don't see what there is to love about Jonathan)

Despite my ramblings (if you've read this far, I'm sorry