Idol, Burning

Such a great read, I didn't want it to end.

I liked the character and found myself relating to her in many ways. I don't think it's ever outright stated but I read her as a neurodivergent (dyslexic for sure) teen who never got the accommodations she needed to properly function in school or in life in general even though she was loved. There are very bleak aspects to this story but it's all rendered in a way that comes across as realistic more than pitying or cruel.

This was a disturbing read. We all probably inherently understand the concepts of celebrity worship, extreme fandom, etc. But to follow the story through well-crafted characters is a gut punch I didn't prepare for. Though it's a short novel, the characters were really well developed. I truly felt the guilt and secondhand embarrassment of indulgent behavior reading this. Yikes, but also wow!

This book definitely made me really uncomfortable and since I think that was the point, I rounded up. Akari's story is disturbing and fascinating — the kind of train wreck that's hard to look away from. I'm not sure if I wanted it to be shorter or longer or what I wanted from it, but I'm glad I read it.

Really sympathetic to the main character, who is a dirty teenager obsessed with a pop idol. I got vibes the whole time that she might be autistic, and the author's treatment of her fixation was respectful and harrowing.

The ending completely snuck up on me bc my edition has a number of additional sections after it ends. Because of the layout of the book, it left me feeling like I missed something, so I went back and re read the last few pages and it was much more impactful.

The kind of book you can read easily, but you can really take your time to luxuriate in the author's creative descriptions and character's emotions.