The Leavers

4.5 stars. I picked this book randomly for Book of the Month in May, and I'm so glad I did. This book will break your hear about a thousand times, but in the best possible way. The narration switching moved the story along and I felt anxious about what was going to happen next. I also hope you'll find the ending as satisfying as I did.

In Lisa Ko's The Leavers, Deming Guo doesn't need any help to know where he came from. Born in the United States to Polly Guo, who had herself smuggled to America to escape a dead-end life in China, Deming was actually sent back to his mother's home village for a few years to live with his grandfather while Polly worked endlessly to try to make some headway on her debts to the loan sharks that got her to New York City in the first place. When we meet Deming, he's in elementary school, living with his mother, her boyfriend, the boyfriend's sister, and her son, Michael, who's about the same age as Deming himself. Then, suddenly, after Polly starts talking about maybe moving to Florida for a job in a restaurant instead of the crushing grind of the nail salon she's been working in for years, she disappears. Already economically strapped, Polly's boyfriend and his sister can't afford to keep Deming with them for long, and he's soon adopted by a pair of white upstate professors, where his new parents dub him “Daniel”, ostensibly to help him get along easier in the overwhelmingly white town he finds himself in.

We next catch up with Daniel in his early 20s, back in NYC and doing musician gigs after he dropped out of college because of an online poker problem. He's crashing with his bandmate, Roland, the only other person of color that he went to school with, and trying to figure out how to avoid going back to school like his parents want him to. He's never found out what happened to his mother, but after a chance reconnection with Michael, his curiosity is reawakened. As he starts to pursue the issue, the perspective changes and we get Polly's story...how and why she came to have Deming, how and why she came to America, and what actually did happen when she disappeared.

I never DNF (do not finish) books, but if I did, I would have dropped this one after about the first 50 or so pages. While the way his childhood played out would give anyone emotional scars, Daniel himself is not an enjoyable character to spend time with. He's whiny, he steals money from his friends, he's a coward. I really did not enjoy reading about him. But when the story switched to his mother, the book took off. Polly is a dynamic, interesting character who practically springs off the page, and her story is easy to get emotionally invested in. I wish Ko had either started with more of Polly or just made her the primary focus of the book overall...starting with Daniel seems like asking to lose a decent chunk of your audience straight out the gate.

And to miss this book entirely would be a shame. Although it's uneven, there's really solid stuff here. Like I said, Polly's story is a great one: she's a fantastic character and her struggles to make it are compelling. Ko also had me cringing in recognition at the way she painted Daniel's adoptive parents and their friends, who adopted a baby girl from China...the self-satisfied pats on their own backs for helping their children “connect with their culture” through food and dance classes, the way Deming is renamed like he's a puppy they picked up at the pound instead of a person. By the end, Ko has developed Daniel into a more understandable character and I came around to appreciating the book, but it really makes you slog through some bad (not even just like challenging, but bad) content to get there.

tw: racism, deportation, graphic mentions of animal slaughter, vomit, microaggressions, the mention of the r-word.

i loved this book so much. I adored the writing and getting to see the world through the eyes of Deming. Deming wasn't a perfect character he's far from it. His life was a whole theme park of roller coasters. His mom disappears one day with no warning nothing but his memories of her. He ends up resenting her as his life moves forward without her as he's adopted by a white couple. This books follows him and his mom throughout the span of 20 ish year in an nonlinear timeline.

I loved that this was a character study of two shitty and morally gray characters. Deming and Polly are both lowkey selfish and they don't change much by the end of the story. I actually like that this left off with a kind of open ending with enough of a happy-ish ending. This was just all around a great book and wow i'm so glad that i was right in my high rating predictions. I cant wait to read whatever else Lisa Ko releases.

3.5

perhaps it's simply because i read this immediately following a little life, but something about it felt incomplete — like there was so much to the story that could have continued, but it was ended short. other than the main plot of the novel, nothing really felt solved in deming/daniel's life. perhaps that is the point of stories, to just plonk you into the most important point of someone's life and leave the rest of it up to your imagination.

but i did love the way the book portrayed how white couples exoticise the adoption of chinese kids they feel need to be “saved.” peter and kay weren't exactly likeable, but they were earnest.

A novel about the 1st and 2nd generation immigration experience in America. Through the eyes of illegal immigrant mother Polly, and her son Deming/Daniel, who ends up in adoption and is torn between two cultures. This is well written, consistent in content and quality, it managed to make me emotional at least once (the skype conversation at his birthday), so all in all solid, but not overly exciting.

3.5 stars

Deming Guo is 11 years old when his mother leaves him. It's not the first time. Making the trip to the United States Deming's mother Polly finds she's too late to have an abortion. Still an infant, Polly briefly leaves Deming in a stiff plastic bag on the pavement under a bench in New York but returns to him. Deming gets sent to China to live with his grandfather for a time before returning to live with his mother, her boyfriend Leon, Leon's sister and her son Michael.

At 11 Deming's mother disappears without a trace. Deming soon finds himself in upstate New York with Peter and Kay, two well meaning liberal arts professors. Deming Guo becomes Daniel Wilkinson - perennial f**k up. Directionless, Daniel has racked up a sizeable gambling debt, dropped out of college and can't find a path that fits him.

Both characters seem less than sympathetic but Lisa Ko builds them out so that while you may not agree with their choices, you can certainly empathize. It's a tough look at the immigrant experience, struggling to fit in while trying to integrate between warring cultures and identities, finding your place in an indifferent world and living with the choices you've made to live within it.

The leavers, and the left behind

The news recently has been heart-wrenching. I can not help but be destroyed when I hear stories of children torn from their families not for any rational reason, but because of a political ideology based on hatred of the other.

It is one thing to “protect” a border—the whole notion of border protection is problematic in a globally-networked world, but let's leave that one alone for now—and another to act in malice and separate children from their parents and to leave them in a physical and psychological limbo.

Listening to the recent “Divided” series on The Daily, I've been thinking about a lot about how one of the biggest horrors that these children have to go through is the lack of knowing: they do not know where there parents are, but more saliently, they do not know why they are gone, or what they have done to be separated.

I'm reminded of reading Lisa Ko's The Leavers last year, and how I was so shook by one of the central questions in the novel: how is someone supposed to feel when they are the one being left behind? What happens when your parent leaves, without explanation or even saying goodbye, and you're left to piece together the answers to questions you never should have been forced to face?

These children—even the ones who have been or will be reunited—will grapple with this every day: “I was left, and my parents were the leavers.”

The fact that there was no choice in the matter, that it was forced separation won't matter to them, especially at this age: they just know that, all of a sudden, they were alone.

A world where children have to face those thoughts is a horrid world indeed.

(originally published on inthemargins.ca)

tw: racism, deportation, graphic mentions of animal slaughter, vomit, microaggressions, the mention of the r-word.

i loved this book so much. I adored the writing and getting to see the world through the eyes of Deming. Deming wasn't a perfect character he's far from it. His life was a whole theme park of roller coasters. His mom disappears one day with no warning nothing but his memories of her. He ends up resenting her as his life moves forward without her as he's adopted by a white couple. This books follows him and his mom throughout the span of 20 ish year in an nonlinear timeline.

I loved that this was a character study of two shitty and morally gray characters. Deming and Polly are both lowkey selfish and they don't change much by the end of the story. I actually like that this left off with a kind of open ending with enough of a happy-ish ending. This was just all around a great book and wow i'm so glad that i was right in my high rating predictions. I cant wait to read whatever else Lisa Ko releases.