Turtles All the Way Down

Confession time: I was a John Green fan girl at some point in my life. One of my most vivid memories of the home I grew up in is laying on the porch swing on the screened in side of the porch in a hugely oversized orange hoodie late, late at night sobbing my eyes out to TFIOS for the 77th time. I also gifted copies of Looking For Alaska to everyone that I could rope into a conversation about my favorite book. Moral of this story is of course I had to read Turtles All The Way Down.

This book is uncomfortable. One of the most uncomfortable books I've read. And because of that, my review is so mixed, my feelings are so mixed. So for you, dear reader, and myself, I'm making a list and not checking it even once. I'm just writing it and releasing it into the wild. Here we go.

Pros: Amazing mental illness representation, specifically OCD and anxiety disorders. The protagonist suffers from these and that's part of what makes this book so uncomfortable, tbh. I'm not saying that because I'm uncomfortable reading about mental illness, quite the opposite. My husband struggles with OCD, thankfully not as advanced as Aza's. We both have anxiety disorders and depression. I'm not unfamiliar with mental illness. It's uncomfortable because it's real and it's triggering. But it's amazing, accurate representation that is so needed, which leads us to pro number two.

A realistic ending. No one saves anyone in this book. No one has the perfect happy ending. Loose ends are not tied up. Aza isn't normal and never will be. She isn't magically cured. Because that's not how life works. And that's something I personally enjoy now and then in a fiction. Happy endings get old sometimes. This is a pro on my personal list, but I understand some people would not love this.

Moving on.


Cons: Terrible plot. I did not at any point understand or enjoy the storyline. I feel like Green wanted to write a book about a girl with OCD (for which I applaud him) but he had no storyline so he just threw in a disappearance and sprinkled in some romance here and there. It was honestly super super boring and highly predictable. It also kind of made no sense whatsoever.

Also, every character other than Aza felt so flat and one dimensional that I was so disappointed. Who are these people and why should I care about them or Aza's relationship with them? The world shall never know. This is not what I was expecting from a John Green novel. But again, it felt like he had a prerogative here and everything else just kind of fell by the wayside.
I'm sure I could ramble on some more but I just don't want to. The storyline was boring and since that's the core of a novel, my cons list is done here.


Would I read it again? No. The only reason I gave it three stars is the mental illness rep.

Would I recommend this book?
Probably not. And trigger warning for OCD and anxiety. I guess read it if you want to feel represented? But seek out other options first. Sorry this is harsh!!! I hate being mean but I'm so disappointed tbh.