Turtles All the Way Down

I can't really say I enjoyed this, as enjoyed isn't the right word. I found this book well written, interesting, and compelling, and Aza had a unique voice and perspective. The John Green hyper-literate verbal teen trope was still in effect, along with a few zany plot points, but the central premise was interesting and thoughtful and personal.

So what the cover description of this book doesn't explicitly mention is that Aza, the main character, has a pretty severe anxiety disorder. That's really the core topic of the book - her thought spirals and dealing with life while caught in them. I trust John Green to write about these because he also suffers from severe anxiety. He's talked about it in interviews and his vlogbrothers Youtube channel. (I'm a big Green brothers fan - what's known as a nerdfighter.) So when John Green writes a character with anxiety, I believe that it's a realistic portrayal. I loved the integration of technology in the story - two characters don't just text each other, the text conversation is on the page, formatted differently, so it's obvious these are text messages. I always love books that do that.

There's not a whole lot I can say about the book without giving things away; a lot of John Green's characters tend to wax eloquently about philosophy and things outside themselves, and Aza doesn't do that because she's so trapped within her own thoughts. She can't think of the future or existential dread because she's too worried about the microbes in her stomach getting out of control and giving her diseases. Definitely a departure from his usual story, though it does fit his standard MO of Main character meets other character who profoundly changes main character's life in some way. (There's a third part that is also consistent with most of John Green's novels but it's a spoiler.)

I think the book is a really good book for anyone who loves someone with anxiety. Or even for those who have anxiety themselves, to see that they're not alone.

You can find all my reviews at Goddess in the Stacks.

Somehow John Green always finds the perfect words. I don???t know how he does it. He just seems to be magically able to explain emotions and specific feelings. I have almost nothing in common with Aza and somehow I don???t think I have ever related to a character more. They way her thoughts overwhelm her. She can???t control what she thinks.
In the beginning I was concerned it would be one of those books where the main character keeps secrets from the ???love interest??? and then it falls apart because of it. But I shouldn???t have. It was brilliant how everything happened. Not overly dramatic, but the exact right amount of stuff going on.
I found it really interesting how Aza feels like she isn???t in control, like she isn???t real. Like a million things are deciding what she does instead of her deciding for herself. Which is a thing that many people actually struggle with and have trouble with. But at the same time she isn???t real. She???s a character in a book.

Edit: I talked about this book with a friend of mine and I agree with his insight. It seems that all Green's books are the same. It's always a person that is weird or mentally ill in some way. Then one falls in love with the other and about 2/3 of the way in the books something terrible happens/ is revealed. Of course I still liked the book but it does take away some of it. I mean I did anticipate the big reveal. So I am deducting a star..

Confession time: I was a John Green fan girl at some point in my life. One of my most vivid memories of the home I grew up in is laying on the porch swing on the screened in side of the porch in a hugely oversized orange hoodie late, late at night sobbing my eyes out to TFIOS for the 77th time. I also gifted copies of Looking For Alaska to everyone that I could rope into a conversation about my favorite book. Moral of this story is of course I had to read Turtles All The Way Down.

This book is uncomfortable. One of the most uncomfortable books I've read. And because of that, my review is so mixed, my feelings are so mixed. So for you, dear reader, and myself, I'm making a list and not checking it even once. I'm just writing it and releasing it into the wild. Here we go.

Pros: Amazing mental illness representation, specifically OCD and anxiety disorders. The protagonist suffers from these and that's part of what makes this book so uncomfortable, tbh. I'm not saying that because I'm uncomfortable reading about mental illness, quite the opposite. My husband struggles with OCD, thankfully not as advanced as Aza's. We both have anxiety disorders and depression. I'm not unfamiliar with mental illness. It's uncomfortable because it's real and it's triggering. But it's amazing, accurate representation that is so needed, which leads us to pro number two.

A realistic ending. No one saves anyone in this book. No one has the perfect happy ending. Loose ends are not tied up. Aza isn't normal and never will be. She isn't magically cured. Because that's not how life works. And that's something I personally enjoy now and then in a fiction. Happy endings get old sometimes. This is a pro on my personal list, but I understand some people would not love this.

Moving on.


Cons: Terrible plot. I did not at any point understand or enjoy the storyline. I feel like Green wanted to write a book about a girl with OCD (for which I applaud him) but he had no storyline so he just threw in a disappearance and sprinkled in some romance here and there. It was honestly super super boring and highly predictable. It also kind of made no sense whatsoever.

Also, every character other than Aza felt so flat and one dimensional that I was so disappointed. Who are these people and why should I care about them or Aza's relationship with them? The world shall never know. This is not what I was expecting from a John Green novel. But again, it felt like he had a prerogative here and everything else just kind of fell by the wayside.
I'm sure I could ramble on some more but I just don't want to. The storyline was boring and since that's the core of a novel, my cons list is done here.


Would I read it again? No. The only reason I gave it three stars is the mental illness rep.

Would I recommend this book?
Probably not. And trigger warning for OCD and anxiety. I guess read it if you want to feel represented? But seek out other options first. Sorry this is harsh!!! I hate being mean but I'm so disappointed tbh.

I was so down for the whole tuatara subplot and that a whole bunch of teenagers now know what a tuatara is.

The friendship between Aza and Daisy is so realistic and nice to see in a YA book. I found Daisy to be such a consistent and detailed character that I felt like I actually knew her. Aza could have used some more distinguishing characteristics that weren't about her dad, car, or mental health.

The OCD representation is perfect. It's perfect. The ending was so good, and I'm very happy John Green didn't try to wrap up everything and make Aza seem like she was suddenly so much better. It really sends home the message that you aren't able to easily overcome intrusive thoughts with OCD.

The general plot involving the dad fell short for me. I think it's unlikely that the guy would've stayed in a tunnel while freezing to death, given he wasn't homeless and had a crap load of money. However, I completely disagree with people who give the book poor ratings because of this plot (and its lack of development). This the the side plot that gets our characters in certain situations, but the main plot is about Aza's journey with her mental health. That plot doesn't have a uber satisfyingly happy ending because that isn't a reality for people with OCD.

Extrêmement touchant. A mes yeux le résumé du livre ne lui rends pas du tout justice et ne pousse pas à le lire alors qu'il est vraiment profondément touchant. Aza est extrêmement attachante malgré ses problèmes, ou même plutôt grâce à eux. Un livre rempli d'espoirs, de moments extrêmement doux ou au contraire emplis de réflexions profondes. Un très beau moment à nouveau avec John Green.

“Anybody can look at you. It's quite rare to find someone who sees the same world you see.”

“And the thing is, when you lose someone, you realize you'll eventually lose everyone.”

I highlighted this quote because as someone with bpd it really stuck out to me and it's something that I have had breakdowns about.

“I'm sorry.”“You say that a lot.”“I feel it a lot.”

I've heard a lot of mixed reviews when it came to this book and I was so pleasantly surprised when I first began reading and realised how much of a cute and beautiful story it really is.

John Green has always had the ability to write characters that I can't help but root for and fall in love with.

“But you give your thoughts too much power, Aza. Thoughts are only thoughts. They are not you. You do belong to yourself, even when your thoughts don't.”

This is such great advice and it's something my own therapist has said to me. I needed to highlight it because it's a good reminder. I appreciate seeing a character who has the same thoughts and anxieties that a lot of people do in society. It makes me feel seen.

The characters were everything I wanted them to be and I can't express how happy that makes me. All of them quickly became special to me. I'm starting to see that John Green is the common denominator when it comes to that.

I could say so much more about this book but I would be here forever so what I'm going to say is that I am so happy I finally took the time to read this book and I will definitely be revisiting it in the future.

There's so much to say. This was my first John Green book and, according to my reading buddies who fancy his other novels, it's also his most ‘non-textbook John Green' effort (which will be a cool thought to grapple, should I pick up another one of his books in the future) It's an interesting place to start!One of the first things I loved about this book is that the narrative isn't what it seemed. Around six chapters in I began wondering “The ‘story' seems quite plain...I think the real story of this book is Aza's mental journey” - which I believe to be true, for all intensive purposes. I tend to read more non-fiction, and some of those particular book endeavors have covered mental illnesses, many of which we read about in this book. [b:Turtles All the Way Down 35504431 Turtles All the Way Down John Green https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1503002776s/35504431.jpg 21576687] seems like a faithful representation of someone in the darkest of cognitive corners, and there isn't an inch of glorification about such matters, which is refreshing in an age where mental illness terms are thrown around loosely, and cheapened by shallow self-diagnoses and general disregard for the gravity of such conditions.When my thoughts spiraled, I was in the spiral, and of it. And I wanted to tell him that the idea of being in a feeling gave language to something I couldn't describe before, created a form for it, but I couldn't figure out how to say any of that out loud I felt quite emotional at several points in this book, as one would when one reads about the inner dwellings of a lost, confused adolescent in a constant thought spiral. It brought things up; many of which I thought I'd long since buried. The quote above could easily describe the thought worlds of millions of people, regardless of their age - and as Green wrote I felt like the spotlight was on my mind, both how it was ‘back then' and now.I love that he gave Aza the license to entertain often disastrous thoughts, but also managed to push back against any overindulgence (several times throughout the book, really) - perhaps most beautifully when Dr. Singh corrects Aza's mentioning of René Descartes' famous philosophical proposition Cogito ergo sum (I think, therefore I am), as she mentions the often ignored precursory statement: I doubt, therefore I think, therefore I am - rendering the extensional chaos of the phrase with a layer of ease, humanizing the entire thought experiment (and relieving the burdened mind with temporary surety of existence)Argh. There's so much to unpack. But for now, I shall put this book down and continue to reflect on how it's helped my own thinking about a great many things (had to put a Star Wars quote in there somewhere for Daisy) and how extraordinarily John Green manages to capture the chaos of growing up with some lessons for surviving a world which is just as chaotic as Aza's mind!

I just love John Green and he can largely do no wrong, so of course I thought this was delightful. Read it in 4 hours as soon as it was finally delivered to me on release day. I think part of my affection is that I also watch his vlogs and listen to his podcast with Hank, so there's all these little things he's mentioned over the years and it's so fun to see them pop up in a book!

As a fairly well-read person, I think this handled mental illness in a way I haven't seen before, and a way that is wonderful and needed. As someone who has struggled with some anxiety and intrusive thoughts, it was comforting and even exciting to see some of my dark places described so well. YES! That fear I've only named to my husband and mental health counselor is real and in this book and I'm not alone!

It seems John Green can't not write an extremely engrossing book. The look inside the mind of a young girl with a mental disorder made me feel fascinated, saddened and encouraged. It was no Fault In Our Stars for me personally but this book was powerful in its own way and I can see how for people with an interest in this specific topic could say this is the best John Green has done.

My friends, if I told you that I have never been so excited to read a book, I would not be lying to you. I've been looking forward to reading this book since I read the first page a few months ago and yesterday, I took full advantage of a rare snow day in Louisiana and read it in one sitting.

Don't worry, I won't spoil anything.

This story is about Aza, who has always had self confidence issues. Her struggles affect her life everyday and it's not just her, but her friends too. After an old friend's dad disappears, they reconnect and Aza tries to solve the mystery. Again, I'm not here to spoil anything!

What I love about this book is how much I can relate to it. People don't understand how hard living with depression and OCD can be. Throughout the book, Aza has to deal with intrusive thoughts. John Green does a great job representing how these thoughts can totally take control. I deal with this myself. People assume that OCD means you like to clean things, but they don't understand the “obsessive” part of OCD. Aza's thoughts make her question everything to the point where she hurts herself - therein lies the compulsion.

If you want to get an idea of what it's like living with OCD, dealing with it on a regular basis, and finding the strength to find help, you need to read this book.

Thank you for this, John Green.

I didn't hate it, but I certainly didn't love it. It was very underwhelming and fairly inconsistent.

Spoilers

She's terrified of germs, specifically c. Diff. But has no problem sitting in a sewer?! What? Nonsense.

Also, the rich man leaving all his money to a lizard just abandoned his family to go and die in said sewer? Just the whole ending is preposterous. I was waiting for him to be hidden in a bunker down there since his company was the one to build it. Would have made so much more sense even if it has been predictable.

I thought I'd be able to read YA forever but maybe I'm wrong, thanks John Green