Choosing Civility
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Most people would agree that thoughtful behavior and common decency are in short supply, or simply forgotten in hurried lives of emails, cellphones, and multi-tasking. In Choosing Civility, P. M. Forni identifies the twenty-five rules that are most essential in connecting effectively and happily with others. In clear, witty, and, well...civilized language, Forni covers topics that include: * Think Twice Before Asking Favors * Give Constructive Criticism * Refrain from Idle Complaints * Respect Others' Opinions * Don't Shift Responsibility and Blame * Care for Your Guests * Accept and Give Praise Finally, Forni provides examples of how to put each rule into practice and so make life-and the lives of others-more enjoyable, companionable, and rewarding. Choosing Civility is a simple, practical, perfectly measured, and quietly magical handbook on the lost art of civility and compassion.
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Forni is European and it shows. He comes from a culture where respect for people is assumed. America disappoints him now and then. He wants to help America.
I need to practice these twenty-five things. If I practiced just these twenty-five things, I would be a much better person.
So what are they? Let me list them to remind myself:
1. Pay attention
2. Acknowledge others
3. Think the best
4. Listen
5. Be inclusive
6. Speak kindly
7. Don't speak ill
8. Accept and give praise
9. Respect even a subtle “no”
10. Respect others' opinions
11. Mind your body
12. Be agreeable
13. Keep it down (and rediscover silence)...most difficult for me
14. Respect other people's time
15. Respect other people's space
16. Apologize earnestly and thoughtfully
17. Assert yourself
18. Avoid personal questions
19. Care for your guests
20. Be a considerate guest
21. Think twice before asking for favors
22. Refrain from idle complaints
23. Give constructive criticism
24. Respect the environment and be gentle to animals
25. Don't shift responsibility and blame
That's it. I can do these them. I will start now.
