Non Violent Communication A Language of Life
Ratings53
Average rating4.2
This book is on my ‘Every Human Should Read List' for a reason. It feels like the kind of emotionally intelligent conversations we should have been taught but never heard. It's not easy, but it's eye-opening.
I was absolutely blown away by this book! It's an audio-only version of the material covered in [a:Marshall B. Rosenberg 40541 Marshall B. Rosenberg https://images.gr-assets.com/authors/1275843700p2/40541.jpg]'s book of a similar name, [b:Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life 71730 Nonviolent Communication A Language of Life Marshall B. Rosenberg https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1386925124l/71730.SY75.jpg 2766138]. It distills his lifetime of work on NVC.I think it might have been 20 years since my brother-of-choice recommended Rosenberg's work to me. Yes, sometimes I'm slow. I intend to go ahead and read the print version as well as re-listen to this one several times. The thing that really struck me was the empathic way of approaching people, including oneself.
Great strategies but the content could be so easily weaponized that I have some concern over this text's cult following.
Marshall is the Bob Ross of language. Makes it sound easy, compassion, soothing voice to listen to if you get the audiobook. NVC, while definitely not native language for me, makes sense, and I refer a lot of my clients to it. Reading the book affirms even more my appreciation. I appreciate his personal anecdotes and perspective about clinical psychology as validating to my holistic approach. The book felt relatively comprehensive, although reading it is not enough to make practicing it feel easy...and I would love to hear more about the self empathizing/being with that must be involved to look to connect with the other's pain in egregious and inflammatory interactions.
Even if you have no interest in learning about NVC, I'd recommend this audiobook if you have trouble sleeping. Let his voice tuck you in!
It started pretty strong and reasonable, but finished with typical anecdotes of self-help books.
I got these useful bits out of it:
* learn to express needs instead of demands
* learn to articulate observation of others without value judgement (positive or negative)
These two combined can sooth out many otherwise confrontational encounters.
The book explains in detail the Non-Violent Communication Process. It helps how to deal better with all kind of situations and how to be empathic towards the other person and discover the needs.
NVC has 4 steps:
1. Observations (see, hear, remember, imagine)
2. Feelings (emotion or sensation rather than thought)
3. Needs (what I/you need or value; rather than a preference), e.g. I feel nervous
4. Request (clearly requesting that which would enrich my/your life without demanding): The concrete actions I like taken (“would you be willing to”). 4 may be unspoken if empathy is offered
It's a great glimpse into Rosenberg's theory and way of life, even if because it's a compilation of talks it brings a lot of stories we know from the other books.
Some of the book is typical self-help fare: semi-believable anecdotes from conferences and history. But on the whole it lives up to its reputation as a ambitious but pragmatic system for solving problems and talking about emotions.