Santa Steps Out
"Visions far tastier than sugarplums dance in Santa's head tonight..."
His generosity is legendary. He has a devoted wife, a crack team of sky-borne reindeer, hordes of industrious elves, and the love of good little boys and girls around the globe. But what dark desire now propels him into the lascivious clutches of a certain fairy? And who was he before sleigh and workshop, in times forgotten?
She munches on molars, summons drowned sailors to her pleasure, and recalls, sharp as a pinprick, her life as the most savage of ash nymphs. Why then is she stuck, night after night, hovering above pillows to leave coins for gap-toothed brats? More important, how quickly can she captivate the jolly old elf to the north?
He's huge, fluffy, lonesome, and unbearably horny. On his Easter rounds, he contrives, as often as possible, to get a grip on himself and stare into interesting bedrooms. But who in the world will throw him down and ravage him as the lovers under his gaze ravage one another?
For the answers, unknot that bright red bow, tear off those wrappings, and enjoy!
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Definitely one of the oddest books I've read. This book (which is categorized in the Horror genre) is about a lusty Santa Claus who carries on a highly libidinous affair with the Tooth Fairy. And to complicate things, Santa's exploits are making the Easter Bunny crazy with jealousy. The Easter Bunny is, of course, a giant rabbit with the ability to become invisible but his only paramour is a self-made model he's named Petunia, made from wire mesh and bunny excrement. Oh, and of course Mrs. Claus finds out and gets royally ticked. She enacts a memorable revenge. This book is like some bizarre dream dripping with explicit sex, gruesome scenes of gory horror, and a benevolent Santa who enjoys taking time out from his yearly rounds to indulge himself in hours of carnality with the twisted but curvaceous Tooth Fairy. It's kind of like a Penthouse letter mixed with Clive Barker and a fairy tale. It's hard to imagine upstanding citizens reading this book and not hurling it from them with a disgusted look. But there's also some cons to this book: it's a little overlong for such a simple plot and Mrs. Claus' actions aren't always in character. I would not recommend this book to anyone who's offended by graphic sex and violence or blasphemy. But if you're looking for something truly odd then this fits the bill.
