How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships
Ratings37
Average rating3.7
"A controversial, idea-driven book that challenges everything you know about sex, marriage, family, and society"--Provided by publisher.
Since Darwin's day, we've been told that sexual monogamy comes naturally to our species. But this narrative is collapsing. Here, renegade thinkers Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá, while debunking almost everything we "know" about sex, offer a bold alternative explanation. Ryan and Jethá's central contention is that human beings evolved in egalitarian groups that shared food, child care, and, often, sexual partners. Weaving together convergent, frequently overlooked evidence from anthropology, archaeology, primatology, anatomy, and psychosexuality, the authors show how far from human nature monogamy really is. With intelligence, humor, and wonder, Ryan and Jethá show how our promiscuous past haunts our struggles over monogamy, sexual orientation, and family dynamics. Human beings everywhere and in every era have confronted the same familiar, intimate situations in surprisingly different ways. The authors expose the ancient roots of human sexuality while pointing toward a more optimistic future illuminated by our innate capacities for love, cooperation, and generosity.--From publisher description.
Reviews with the most likes.
This book covers so much ground! I cannot even begin to summarize, except to say that if I had somehow been able to read it in magical hypertext that took me to all the other books it even talks about, I would still be lost in reference material. And I want to read them all!
Also - ever wondered why the average woman is louder during sex than the average man? What about the cause of men's mid-life crises? Are humans naturally monogamous as a species? Why or why not?
I am aware that another book has been written just to rebut this one. I might read it. I will at least take a look and consider it, to be fair.
An interesting take on the history of monogamy in humans, our ancestors and our relatives. The important thing to put aside when reading this one is any preconception of ethics or morality. This is a scientific and historical study of how societies have structured societies in different cultures.
One of the best and most comprehensive books that I've read on human relations. Coming from a deeply religious background, and being force-fed the standard narrative of human relations - this book was a gust of much needed fresh air. I'm reading it again with my partner!