Spare

What a heartbreakingly beautiful book about loss, grief, love and hope. No one deserves this much trauma and devastation in one lifetime, but unfortunately Prince Harry continues to catch flack in spades for not living up to other people's ridiculous ideas of being a perfect royal. He made mistakes but he also very clearly states how he learned from them and grew as a person, which we're all allowed to do.

The intricate details of his early life and enlistment are a tough read, but they're threaded with so may beautiful moments with his family. The non-linear approach felt organic--an interaction led to a feeling which led to a memory. This book felt like he was understanding and diffusing trauma triggers with every page.

I really don't understand the hate over Prince Harry and Meghan Sussex, but I also like to think I'm not a vindictive, racist, classcist, asshat who doesn't have anything better to do than agonize over worthless tabloids. This is genuinely a well-written, evocative book that gives an inside look at a royals' lives but more importantly encourages agency, growth and change. I highly recommend the audiobook to truly hear Prince Harry's story in his own words.

What is going on in the publishing industry? I know there was a ghost writer and probably multiple editors. So how did they allow such a heavily advertised, long awaited book be so boring? I know this is purported to be Harry's story. (Though so many times while listening all I could think of was Queen Elisabeth saying some recollections will vary.) It wasn't a shock that Harry is the star/hero in Spare. But where were the charming anecdotes? The only thing this man is known for is being one of Princess Diana's sons and son of the current King of England. Grandson of the longest reigning monarch of England. Obviously, Harry has issues with his family. But to present this as if there was never any good to these relationships, not any of them? No happy recollections for balance or even to make their issues more poignant? For me this just came across as enormously whiney. Poor little ol' me locked in the attic and half starved when we know, while there are issues within that rich and privileged group, they do lead extraordinary lives with experiences the rest of us can only dream of. I did enjoy hearing about trips to countries I won't get to see but was expecting more tales about what goes on within the royal palaces and estates. Only one whiney tale about Christmas? Nothing about life as Charles and Diana's son prior to her death? Obviously, Harry was traumatized by his mother's death when he was just 12 and I guess this is what arrested development can sound like. But I was really disappointed. He cannot remember his mummy or life with her but he managed to remember and refute every tabloid headline of his life? It read as if he has kept a scrapbook!
The stories of Harry's army service were somewhat better as obviously he was engaged there and this was his profession. And it was lovely to hear him recount his happiness with Meghan and joy in fatherhood. I was horrified by the tales of how invasive the British tabloid press and paparazzi are. I can see that they were undoubtably more tenacious in chasing Princess Diana's sons and their cohorts than the children of Anne, Andrew or Edward. I can even see where Meghan's background, being a biracial divorced American actress incited them to a greater and more dangerous frenzy. But many parts of Harry's “truth” simply don't add up. He was not poor. Harry inherited a bigger share from his mother to make up for the fact that he was not the “heir.” Charles paid a very large amount of money, that he needed to report publicly, to Harry and Meghan when they decided to separate from the royal family. Meghan had considerable net worth from her own work before her retirement from acting. Harry remarks that there are estates where they could have lived safely as long as they weren't trying to live public lives. But of course, that isn't what either wants, at least not yet, is it?

Spare is full of interesting revelations of the modern-day British monarchy, ranging from their strange family dynamics to rampant racism to priviliged wealth and miscalculations. The book both humanizes and alienates all involved while revealing the difficulties Harry and Meghan have faced from the press and their families. It's interesting enough for those curious about the racism Meghan faced but still reads like a gossip magazine.

I rated this book pretty highly because I enjoyed reading all the tea he spilt but also just learning his perspective on how he grew up. I don't agree with all of his takes, of course, but it was a good glimpse into his life. As dumb as the monarchy is, the whole concept of it and their lives are still fascinating to me.

Probably more of a 3.5 but I'm rounding up.

I may be anti-monarchy as an institution but I'm also one of many who was fascinated by Princess Diana, so I was definitely very interested to read this book. Meghan and Harry's Netflix documentary had also primed me for this.

And while there are parts from the documentary which are told here again and it can get repetitive, but there's also a lot of new information. I guess most of it just felt very surprising because the royal family, their dynamics, the way they do things, what they believe in - it almost feels like they aren't from our world and there were many instances where I felt incredulous. The middle portion of the memoir which is about Harry's experiences in the military and the war made me a lot uncomfortable, and I'm frankly astonished he was so candid about everything. This is definitely a book which felt like he was venting everything that he had never been able to talk about, and all I can hope is that it was therapeutic for him.

Reading it may feel a bit tedious though, because it's very stream of consciousness style of writing and the chapters sometimes were very small and ended abruptly. But he narrates the audiobook himself and that was definitely a better way to consume this memoir. I'm definitely feeling quite sympathetic towards him after finishing this and I can only hope he can find peace in his life in America, away from the fish bowl.

This man is utterly unaware of the wider context anything he does happens in, or the implications of anything he says or does. Growing up as part of the Royal Family has stunted his development into an adult and disconnected him from base reality. But if nothing else his heart seems to be in the right place, and I am absolutely certain of two things: he misses his mother, and he would burn down the world to protect his wife.

As someone who just finished this book, and seeing no reviews from others who have actually read it, I feel a moral obligation to leave a review. 3.5 stars rounded up to 4 due to the preemptive hate.

This book reads as an extreme stream of consciousness and is slightly tedious to get into. However, it is a vulnerable and at times overtly descriptive account of Prince Harry's life. For those of you looking for drama - he very much so delivers.

It is clear that he wrote this book after much reflection and deeply dives into the various traumas he suffered. Does his privilege seep through the writing at points? Absolutely. Did I find myself deeply sympathizing with him? Very much so. I found myself pleasantly surprised by the writing itself. Prince Harry has a very poetic way of writing, constantly connecting themes and stories throughout the book. Sharp prose, detailed accounts and foreshadowing, and an unprecedented naming of villainous figures make for a scintillating and engrossing read.

The book is split into 3 parts; the first about his childhood post Princess Diana's death, the second about his time in the military, and the third his story with Meghan. We see how his grief shaped his childhood. The lack of support and loneliness further crippling him. He is held prisoner in a lifestyle devoid of independence and later finds himself stuck and aimless. We also get much insight into his familial relationships especially those between him and his brother and father and how they became strained over time. He unsparingly writes of the personal and institutional failures that affected his life, while also touching on his own unconscious biases and gaps in thinking. This book is not all bleak as I am making it out to be, but also vividly details his healing. Whether it is finding peace in Botswana, a sense of belonging during his time in Afghanistan, or the impacts of therapy he writes rawly and freely of his journey to happiness.

I do have issues with the way he writes about British imperialism and the affects of colonialism. He half-heartedly addressed how the monarchy was built off the blood and labor of African and Asian countries and was a bit insensitive at some points- I was not impressed.

At the end of the day when so many others have profited off of telling untrue stories about H and M's lives, why should they, themselves, not be able to profit while speaking their truth? Of course the real truth is probably some middle ground between their and the institution's version of events, however this memoir allows one to understand Harry's character and thought processes and form an opinion for themselves.

No matter what your feelings towards the institution or the Sussexes, I urge you to read this with an open mind and truly try to empathize with the very people who's lives are affected by the vitriol spewed by the British media. As for the quotes currently circulating around, much has been taken out of context. Read the book to actually understand what he's trying to say.

Everywhere I go, I cannot escape talk about Prince Harry's memoir so I decided to pick it up for myself once and for all.

I don't want to go into detail about my thoughts and feelings on this but what I will say is that my heart will forever break for Harry and William for the loss of their mother. Diana was loved by many but she was everything to them.

It was so heartbreaking to read about Harry going through his grief and how he felt guilty because he couldn't cry yet strangers who didn't even know Diana couldn't stop. Losing someone is devastating but I couldn't imagine what it would be like to experience a loss so profound so publicly.

This was a very interesting read and it was intriguing to have a sneak peak into the life of the royals.

Here is the thing about autobiographies; they contain the things the subject wants you to know about them. Not everything about them, not even necessarily the 100% honest truth about them. But the stuff they think you should know about them to get the picture they want to project.
And this is exactly why I have no idea what the actual fuck Prince Harry was thinking while writing this.

Some moments, I could really understand him. Seriously. Nobody likes to have their privacy ruined. Being a public figure from birth sounds like a shit deal. It must be awful.
Hell, he even had moments when he sounded mature, like when he talked about accepting that his father was happy with Camilla. I applauded him for that.
Then he just had these moments when he managed to ruin all my empathy and positive feelings with one astonishingly stupid statement. Don't get me wrong, we are all products of our upbringing and experiences in life, therefore his baseline for what life should be is way different than mine or yours. That's a fact. But there were moments when he genuinely sounded like he had never met a human being before. I'm not even saying average human, as he didn't spend too much time in genuine relationships with average little people, but just... any human, really. What do I mean?
His weirdness culminates when it comes to talking about Meghan, his wife. Sure, he loves her, that's wonderful. But at one point he is amazed by her not being bitchy about having to wait 3 hours at an airport to get to the Botswana vacation he got for the two of them.
Harry. Friend. If anyone paid for my Botswana vacation.... I could accept some minor inconvenience. Hell, a bunch of us get that when we pay for our own vacation with the money we actually had to earn with hard work. And it's still a privilege that we are able to travel at all.

Privilege. That is a bit of a keyword here.
I'm not the type to claim everyone I dislike is privileged and claim that's an evil horrible thing that needs to be taken away.
Yet Harry here has a really weird relationship with his own privilege. He calls himself privileged when he is talking about the video where he calls his friend a Paki. Yet he talks about just popping off to Botswana to hang out with his nature documentary maker friends when he feels stressed. You know what I mean?
He has this attitude of everything bad in his life being this gigantic unjust crime, but at the same time he takes so much of the amazing experiences and possibilities as just normal. Again, I get it, he grew up with this. But he is writing a book kind of thinking about his own life. WHERE IS YOUR PERSPECTIVE? He even mentions that the military pilot education he got costing millions of pounds. But hey. No biggie, it's his and it makes him feel good. So it's normal.
Sometimes he mentions how these things are great, but he never faces the fact that the only reason he can do all this is because of who and what he is. Harry the Prince only gets the awful stuff, none of the perks are because of the same thing.

He's incredibly unrealistic in many other ways as well. The way he talks about his wife is supremely weird. Some people are more mushy when they are in love, but this. THIS. He is just unable to understand that there are people who can dislike Meghan. He claims the British people not liking her is his own country betraying him. He calls her magic.
Every single time she is not automatically adored, he claims she is being abused. Meghan acts in a way that is actually rude (like asking for the lipgloss of Kate, whom she barely even knows, YUCK) and he can't help freaking the fuck out about people not tolerating it.
Talking about freaking out. There is this one moment while they are dating. They have a misunderstanding. He gets pissed and apparently he says some mean things. In this 500 page book filled with details about his frostbitten penis (yes, really), we don't get explained what this argument was. Okay. But the way he reacts to his own anger is pathetic. He totally crumbles, says it's unacceptable for him to be angry with her and suddenly feels the need to go to therapy. Not when he believed Diana was just hiding until his TWENTIES. Not when he obviously had drinking problems. But when he snapped at perfect MEEEEEG.
Not sure how I feel about his conversations with his therapist. He needs help. That's true. But he seems to surround himself with people and things that make him try and get the exact wrong kind of “help”. Like a man who has a so obviously distorted version of reality... should probably not do psychedelics and listen to “spirit mediums” who tell him his dead mother is actually still hanging out with him. Just a thought.

Now about one of the main ideas; Harry wants privacy. Again, understandable.
Then he goes and tells us he used up all the laughing gas when Meeeeeg was in labor with their first child. That he is circumcised. Where and how he lost his virginity. Mate, what are you doing?
What is even worse, he does the same with other people. Often people he tries to make appear in a bad light. Like fuck off with talking about his dad having been severly bullied as a kid and still having this toy rabbit to comfort him. Fuck off with assuming the complicated and long relationship between Queen Elizabeth II and Princess Margaret (and assuming Elizabeth started every conflict).
He shows absolutely ZERO respect for anyone else's right to privacy. What was the goal here? Because it's such a spineless thing to do, acting so petty.

Talking about petty, he is incredibly jealous of his brother. As opposed to him just having so many hardships, the life of Prince William is just enviable in Harry's eyes. His brother has no hardships! Those are reserved for him and him alone.

All in all, I did not develop the fondest feelings for Prince Harry. Yet, I see King Charles as more of a human being now. Which wasn't the goal, but hey. I take what I can get.

I wasn't sure if I would read this. I have never been particularly interested in the royal family as I do think the institution is archaic and should be done away with. Why should anybody be seen as more important simply because of the circumstances of their birth? But when I heard about Harry and Megan in the news, I've always rooted for them. I never actively sought out stories about them and I didn't bother with the Oprah special or Netflix special because I felt like while I hope they are doing well, I'm just not interested in celebrity gossip. But my book club decided to read this and admittedly with a title like Spare, I was really curious.

I don't agree with Harry on everything, like I do think the monarchy should be dissolved and I don't think the war in the Middle East was a worthy cause, but I really respect him. Yes he has not had to worry about finances in the way most people have and in that way he's very privileged. But I honestly don't know how much you'd have to pay me to make what he has been through, such as the devastating and public death of his mother and the intense surveillance and cruelty executed by the press. I don't think we should have a monarchy but I do believe human beings deserve to be treated like human beings, particularly by their own family members. I hope he and his family are living well now and it really does seem like he's living the life Diana would have wanted for herself and for him.

I enjoyed the writing and felt myself brought to tears a few times. I wasn't as interested in the stuff about the military but it was important to get the whole picture.

Oh also there are some wild things Harry writes in here that are pretty personal but I think it seems like a great way to get ahead of people who want to use something against you by saying it yourself first, so good for him honestly. Some parts were really amusing as well.

This was a book filled with a LOT of issues - as in, Price Harry needs serious therapy. The first 60% of the book was plain depressing. I don't think many people would disagree that living as a royal comes with a lot of crap - Paps, lack of privacy, lack of freedom, lack of support when you're going through tough things - like your mother dying, for example. At the same time though, Harry makes repeated stupid decisions well into his late 20's - from doing coke, mushrooms, playing strip poker in Vegas and surrounding himself with people who REALLLLYY love alcohol - Harry doesn't seem to learn from his mistakes and has very little regard for how those decisions impact his family. He seems to spend most of his free time partying and complaining.

I cannot image having so little privacy or choice in life, but it seems Harry has very little interest in learning about the world, culture or how “the average person” lives (reading books would fix 90% of this). He has very little interest in education, even as an adult and it's painfully obvious he grew up in a bubble - he seems like an incredibly boring person despite his crazy lifestyle.

The reason I'm rating this so low is because this really seems like reading someone's private diary. Spare paints Harry as the underdog that becomes the hero and it's cringy, embarrassing and boring to read. I don't give a crap about his frost bitten bits, his phone being ruined by water and writing dramatic love letters to Megan or his complete lack of awareness of how his choices impact his loved ones - but those are the details he thought important to share with the world.

I know next to nothing about the royal family (honestly I couldn't tell you the names of any of them before reading this book). I never watched interviews with anyone, I haven't seen the crown and I don't watch any news stories about the royal family. This is all coming from someone who couldn't care less about who they are or what they do. So my review comes from a very neutral place and you know when I say that Harry seems like a spoiled brat who didn't get enough love as a child and also has some traumatic events happen to him, you know I am getting that directly from his perspective on life. Why are the royals even a thing? It seems absolutely bizarre to me.

I cannot understand how I managed to get through it, just because it was so infuriating at times. I would've preferred to have read the memoir of some more interesting spares like Princess Margaret, but alas they have decided to take their secrets to the grave. This spare in particular is a spoiled brat, completely oblivious of all the great things in his life and how lucky he is compared to the rest of the world. What is annoying is that none of this is his fault. He was born into it.
What Harry succeeds with this book is convincing people that the monarchy is a thing of the past and no longer required.

I had high hopes for this book, genuinely I did. Being an avid reader this year, I wanted to join the chorus of praise surrounding it, but unfortunately, I can't. I approached the book with an open mind, without any strong preconceptions about Harry and his family drama. My intention was to delve into the real story behind the numerous magazine covers and headlines that I had ignored. It was like embarking on a journey, anticipating a delightful sip of “English Tea.”

However, right from the first chapter, the writing put me off. The author painted a picture of a season caught between winter and spring, where bare trees, soft air, gray skies, and blooming tulips created a beautiful yet melancholic atmosphere. It was an intriguing mix of positives and negatives.

In his own words, Harry portrayed himself as remarkably brave, a quality that typically merits acknowledgment from others. He emphasized his readiness to take action while others hesitated, claiming that he never required a second request to complete a task. It was a bold self-assessment. He even hinted at the possibility of donating organs to his brother if the need arose, a suggestion that might concern his mother. He complained about his brother having a larger room in the castle, better furniture, and how Meghan had to purchase a couch on her credit card from IKEA. These instances raised doubts about his claims of financial disadvantage. The extensive and repetitive pages dedicated to his bravery and exceptional helicopter flying skills felt self-indulgent, as if he had a separate book in mind solely for that topic. Undeniably, this section of the book became tiresome. Consequently, my opinion of Harry as a person did not become favorable after reading this book. Meghan, on the other hand, came across as lovely, but unfortunately, the book did not provide much insight into her character. Ultimately, Harry appeared to be a troubled individual, and I genuinely hope he finds peace in California.

Maybe 3.5 stars

This is just a depressing book. It feels like he's writing down everything in a journal of past repressed memories. Everything he's writing about he's complaining for one thing or another. Even the good times, he finds something to complain about.
In the second part is him coming to terms with what he goes through and the start of seeking help, which I applaud him for. Unfortunately it's only a small section. Overall, the book was just too depressing but it does give us a glimpse of what he's gone through.

I've watched the mini-series that Harry and Meghan put out and their Oprah interview. I've never been interested in celebrity gossip or tabloid fodder. Reading the actual stories or watching something told from a celebrity's actual perspective is what is interesting to me. I can't imagine living the lifestyle of the rich and famous. It always sounds terrible. I hope for peace and safety for Harry and Meghan.