The Heart Principle

I like romance full of shlock, but I'm not (in theory) opposed to challenging the leads with non-romantic IRL issues. It's just this one dug so deep in that direction that it made me wonder why it needed to have any romance at all. Quite frankly, I'm kind of wondering if it's worse off for having that as a focal point since it just distracts from the other elements at play. The book's resolution also really rubbed me the wrong way.

”The thing with feelings is they pass. Hearts aren't designed to feel anything too intensely for too long, be it joy, sorrow, or anger. Everything passes in time. All colors fade.”

As someone who is on the autism spectrum, the books in these instalments always hold a special place in my heart.

What I love the most about these books is that it gives a fantastic representation of people on the spectrum by exploring the non-stereotypically aspects of it. The idea that people believe that all autistic people have the same characteristics and if you don't appear to fit those stereotypes that you can't be autistic will never fail to baffle me and I am so happy that was explored in this book, as well as masking.

This was so much more than a romance with the heavy and real topics it portrayed. It's about self-acceptance and learning to not be afraid of reaching out for help.

I loved reading about Anna learning to come to terms with her diagnosis and her accepting that she doesn't need to mask happiness for anyone. Reading her stand up for herself and do what's best for her was so great for me and you can tell that the author put a lot of love into it.

I couldn't give this the five stars that I was wanting to give it since I felt that the romance that was present in the book felt quite rushed and not as developed as I would've liked.

Overall, I loved this and I can see myself rereading this in the future.

Gelezen als audioboek

Oef, niet meteen een luchtig, romcom boek.
Dit boek tackelde echt een paar zware thema's op een loffelijke wijze, maar hierdoor werd de romance helemaal naar de achtergrond gedreven. De weinige interacties die ze hadden waren lief en bewonderenswaardig in hun openheid, maar de andere levensgebeurtenissen namen vlug de bovenhand en ik vroeg mij eerlijk gezegd af waarom die twee persé samen wilden zijn.
Het tempo was ook erg vreemd en naar het einde toe voelde het extreem gehaast en geforceerd.

This book is disjointed but it really really works for me. I'm a sucker for romances where the main characters are kind to each other and this book has that in spades. Even when it gets dark (and boy does it get dark) the characters are so unfailingly patient and vulnerable with each other that it tempers the darkness. I've personally struggled to read romances with darker themes this year because I've wanted light and fluffy, but honestly reading this felt necessary. It was important for me to read about people being lovely to each other even in the midst of all the heavy stuff going on.

Why the fuck would you break your violin... all cuz you don't know how to say no....JUST TO END UP SAYING NO ANYWAY?! now look at you. Broken violin for no reason!

There's no way someone's this much of a pushover like bitch stand UP.

This book wasn't what I thought it was going to be and to be quite honest I'm disappointed. I was mostly excited for this book because Quan is such a good character and I couldn't wait to explore his story & his romance. The romance was on the back burner in this one & that's really upsetting for me. I was expecting a cute little romcom & instead I got a coming of age novel about our FMC Anna.

I feel so cheated

This book was heavy, and dealt with themes of losing a loved one as well as difficult family dynamics. The actual romance was only about 20% of the book & even then it wasn't enough for me to care. And to be quite honest I didn't care about what was going on with Anna in general.

Also Anna did quan dirty idgaf.

The beginning of this book started off so strong for me, I was sure it was to be a 5 stars. I'm feeling very let down.

The characters are better in this book, towards the end in her monologue it does feel a bit like she doesn't have a partner to help her out at all. I feel like we don't at all explore the ways he makes things better or worse and he doesn't appear to help with housekeeping at all.
Too many sex scenes too.
But the characters and story felt richer than her previous two books in this series. Her description of autism also translated better in this book i believe than the past two, as someone without it, it gave me more clarity and insight into some of the nuances of autism for an individual without feeling like it was supposed to be any broad overgeneralizing description of every autistic person.

If you're looking for a light hearted romance don't read this book. It deals with some heavy topics, which is fine...but not something I want in romance books.
 It starts off fun and exciting but quickly becomes Anna's journey with her autism diagnosis, family acceptance, and learning how to standup for herself. It gets really heavy and dark at points, especially with how Anna's family views her neurodivergence as weak and lazy character flaws. There's also a fair amount of family gaslighting going on. These experiences were incredibly raw and left me angry, emotionally drained, and appreciative of Hoang's vulnerability. 

Given the above it felt wrong trying to enjoy the hot smutty scenes. And it didn't gave space for Quan to make mistakes, he felt stifled being perfectly patient and even keeled for Anna. I was really hoping we'd get other sides of him or learn what it was like being Khai's older brother. 

I feel like Anna's story was strong enough to stand on its own.

Hoang mentions in the author's note that this is the most autobiographical of her work to-date, which I had wondered about as I was reading. This is not as light as her previous two books - in addition to the romance (which is wonderful), it deals very much with the slow death of a parent, and what we owe (or are expected to owe) our loved ones when it comes to end-of-life care, especially when there are disagreements about what that person would have wanted at the end of their life. It is heavy, and hard to watch Anna drown in herself while trying to handle being around her family constantly, masking and suffering from autistic burnout without seeing an end in sight.

Quan was a wonderful partner, dealing with his own weighty past, but following his own dreams and dealing with his own issues, both with their relationship and his job. I loved him and Anna together.

TW: suicidal ideation, anxiety, body dysmorphia (male)