The In-Between

Writing was clunky, but the stories were compelling. 

Growing curious about the process of dying, what happens, what's normal and what to expect I also wanted to know more about hospice care as I think it's such a valuable service. This book gave me a lot of stories and answers and also inspired me to read further.

Overall, I think this book is worth reading. It helps to demystify the "process" of dying and helps readers to understand that there are some aspects of dying that seem unusual, but are actually very common. I appreciate the messaging that everyone grieves differently, but from a technical aspect I think the book needs some editing.

If I could make a big change to this book, I would have recommended this book to be about Hadley, but not written by Hadley. There are a lot sections that just come across as Hadley patting herself on the back: Oh, Hadley, you're the only nurse that makes me smile and treats me right... and while it all might be true it just doesn't feel that way sometimes. I would have preferred to see Hadley's work approached more from a journalistic standpoint, with someone observing Hadley and talking to her patients. Obviously stories from her previous work deserve to be in the book, but it needs something to anchor it to the truth.

I do think Hadley is doing a great job of talking to the public about hospice. Her writing makes it seem less scary and depressing. Ideally dying is a peaceful process and hospice nurses, doctors, and workers are responsible for ensuring that. Highly recommend for a book club as I think everyone has a story about death they want to talk about, but don't have the appropriate venue.

Unforgettable Encounters During Life's Final Moments is a collection of deeply moving and reflective stories centered around those whose lives have been effects by hospice services, with its writing as compassionate as it is empathetic. The book brings together first-hand accounts, anecdotes, and reflections from both those who have had direct experiences with the dying and the loved ones who have witnessed these intimate and often emotional moments. Nurse Hadley Vlahos has written an emotionally novel thats overarching theme is the unexpected beauty and peace that can arise in life’s final moments.

Each story, written according to how it was experienced through her own eyes, the author sheds light on the extraordinary range of experiences people have when they are nearing the end of their lives, often involving extraordinary acts of clarity, unexpected memories, and even spiritual encounters. While deeply personal, these moments resonate universally, offering comfort, insight, and a sense of connection. Each story is unique, but many share common threads: themes of reconciliation, the power of love, and often, a final, unspoken exchange that provides closure. Some stories are bittersweet, while others are surprising, revealing how death can sometimes bring clarity or a profound sense of peace. At times, the book can feel emotionally overwhelming, as the stories bring to the surface the complex feelings associated with loss—grief, relief, longing, love—but this is part of its strength. By tackling such raw and universal themes, the book offers a powerful opportunity for readers to reflect on their relationships, mortality, and what it means to truly connect with others.

I happened across the Mr. Carl story on an Instagram reel and decided to read this book. I really enjoyed it. I am a volunteer EMT, so most of my interaction with death and dying is trying to prevent or reverse it in an emergent context. It was really... peaceful, I guess, to read Vlahos' stories about death in another context. 11 out of 12 chapters entirely made me cry, but in a good way.