Ratings19
Average rating4.2
Everyone needs to love and be loved—even men. But to know love, men must be able to look at the ways that patriarchal culture keeps them from knowing themselves, from being in touch with their feelings, from loving. In The Will to Change, bell hooks gets to the heart of the matter and shows men how to express the emotions that are a fundamental part of who they are—whatever their age, marital status, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. But toxic masculinity punishes those fundamental emotions, and it’s so deeply ingrained in our society that it’s hard for men to not comply—but hooks wants to help change that. With trademark candor and fierce intelligence, hooks addresses the most common concerns of men, such as fear of intimacy and loss of their patriarchal place in society, in new and challenging ways. She believes men can find the way to spiritual unity by getting back in touch with the emotionally open part of themselves—and lay claim to the rich and rewarding inner lives that have historically been the exclusive province of women. A brave and astonishing work, The Will to Change is designed to help men reclaim the best part of themselves.
Reviews with the most likes.
There's a lot in this book that I'm still unpacking, but just like All About Love, it has changed my life. Masculinity as taught by patriarchy affects everyone and shapes everyone for the worse, even soft-boy-good-guys
I think this book materialises a lot of my own thoughts, but on the other hand I didn't really like the harsh language used towards feminist women who do not share this view of patriarchy. When dealing with a heart-broken Hulk, it is entirely within reason to distance yourself instead of offering a helping hand, even if the former is certain to provide a better outcome.
2.5 Perplexing generalisations mixed with solid if not repetitive analyses of masculinity in the wake of centuries of patriarchal cultural propaganda. hooks calls for feminist blueprints for transforming masculinity including shedding the model of domination that frames all relationships as power struggles, extricating oneself from violently fragile identities yoked to the pursuit of external power, and building a whole, introspective, expressive, receptive self in partnership and interdependency with the earth and our communities.